Thursday, August 27, 2009

SLAM!!! or so I thought

That is what it feels like right this moment- that a very large- thick heave door has been slammed shut in my face.
Well that was yesterday- I had posted the post below about 12:50pm 08/26/09 and seriously not more then 20 minutes later everything was coming down around me or so I thought.

I received this devotional very early in the morning
Get seriously quiet before Me, says the Lord, for you are approaching a turning point where you need direction and guidance. This will be a break-away moment, a line of demarcation that will separate the past from where you are now and where you are headed. Your past experiences will have very little relevance to what is upcoming, but do not be afraid. This is not a bad thing; it is only a course correction that will produce kingdom destiny in your life. Look forward to all that I have prepared for you.

1 Corinthians 2:9 But as it is written: "Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him."

This came at 1:43pm
Come Monday I have no daycare for Aaron (6 months old) nor can we afford anything. To have him in daycare is about $1000+ a month. Which Julia is $800 a month. We had Julia tested for kindergarten and she passed with flying colors so we registered her and thought WOW this is it if she gets into full day kindy then we can have that $800 to pay for Aaron's daycare needs. Well door today SLAMMED shut- she is still on the waitlist for Full Day and per the school all spots within the full day class have been confirmed and unless someone drops out of full day which they don't see happening she is in 1/2 day- which with Marco and I both working we just can't do 1/2 day kindergarten. 9:30-12 or 12:30-3:30- it doesn't work.

I thought also God was calling me to apply for this new position and really felt everything being confirmed and then today door slammed again in my face.

so now what do i do- Aaron has no daycare come monday- julia doesn't go to kindergarten Tuesday but back to daycare which is just another "heart" issue for me since it isn't the best place for her but we can't afford "better or best"

1:50pm i got this
subject line in a new email is : Words of encouragement are inside

inside the email:
Ever notice how the top headlines in the news are often the most discouraging? It's a good thing that we have other positive things to read like a daily devotion or God's Word. Here's a passage that has encouraged me this week. "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27 (NIV)
at 4pm I got this email:
4 Tips for Living a Fearless Life
If there is one thing I've learned in this recession it is that I don't have to live in fear. This is an amazing realization, actually... especially for me. As a general rule, I don't like to admit that I am afraid. I am sure that I am not alone on this. Let's be honest, we live in a fear-based culture right now. "Uncertainty" is the new buzz word for fear. When fear hits you, it can steal your joy and paralyze you. It rears its ugly head in the form of frustration, withdrawal, or outbursts of anger. You can break free from the grip of fear!

Here are four things you can do to position yourself to live a fearless life:

1.Articulate what you are afraid of to someone you trust. Calmly unpack the root cause of your frustration.

2.Start living for today, and stop worrying about tomorrow. "Each day has enough trouble of it's own." (Matthew 6:34 NIV)

3.Remember that it's not about how much you have, but who you have. Reorient your priorities around building meaningful relationships.

4.Put your trust in God. Acknowledge that God is your source, and he is in control. "Cast all your anxiety on him, for he cares about you." (1 Peter 5:7 NIV)
Today early AM I got this
The enemy is fighting for control and will not give up easily, yet he is already defeated. Refuse to allow discouragement to come when you have a minor setback because this is his last ditch effort to keep you in bondage just before you break forth into unbridled liberty, says the Lord. You are above and not beneath; he is beneath and not above you. Be strong and courageously keep pressing through. Victory is assured.

Deuteronomy 28:13 And the LORD will make you the head and not the tail; you shall be above only, and not be beneath, if you heed the commandments of the LORD your God, which I command you today, and are careful to observe them.
So then I went to go read a blog I follow and found even more inspiration check it out
What's the lesson here and the story that's being told..... I'm not to sure but I know it's in there.
It's not about me, there is a larger story we are in so get out of the small story.
Stand strong in my Faith
Never Doubt or become disappointed or discouraged.
I will sit and wait and be patient and rest.


  1. I was going to express my love and concern and encouragement with a simple emoticon, then I finished your post and was reminded of some things that Beth Moore spoke about in the simulcast this weekend. She spoke about how we are to patiently wait for the Lord. In this and in all cases of the use "wait" in the scriptures, the word is not passive. It means to writhe, to whirl ... to work our out our expectation, our pain, and our excitement by bringing them to him in trust and faith.

    I love watching how you are expectantly waiting for him to move.

    Miss you!

  2. Loved this post! We all need to be reminded sometimes that the victory is already won!:)